Out There: Stories from the Woods

For the past few years Lou Bernard, that local history guy, has been playing a game with his neighbors. The funny thing is – his neighbors did not know they were even involved in the high stakes game!

The name of the game is Lawn Chicken, but be careful – you may not know that you have been a part of it for years.

The rules are below. What started off as a joke among friends on Facebook has turned into a Fairview Street summer game. It goes something like this:

Shared from Lou Bernard:

With the weather warming up, it’s time to begin Fairview Street’s favorite game….LAWN CHICKEN!

For all my newer friends: Lawn Chicken is a game I invented in 2008 because I hate mowing the lawn. It happens when my neighbor and I both refuse to mow, and see who blinks first. I am the reigning champion. (The neighbor I compete with is actually a really nice guy who lives next door.)

Here are the rules—-

Lawn Chicken must be played on adjoining lawns. Both neighbors put off mowing. The first one to mow loses the round.

1. Once one neighbor mows, the other may either mow immediately or continue to ignore the lawn, and the next round begins.
2. It is not necessary that both parties are aware they are playing the game.
3. If one property owner is fined for an unmowed lawn, it is an automatic loss. (Calling to report your neighbor yourself, however, is considered cheating.)
4. If one party should be away for long-term (vacation, prison, etc.), it is considered a forfeit, and the other party wins.
5. Mowing your neighbor’s property as a favor is not forbidden, but not advised. If you want to mow so badly, you shouldn’t be playing Lawn Chicken.
6. It is not considered interference to prod your neighbor to mow. (For instance, being inebriated and stomping a crop circle on their lawn, as in the historic match of 2010.)
7. Further interpretation of the rules as apply to previously unforeseen circumstances will be put up for a vote on Facebook. Because, why not? The fans get to participate. Anyone who says something like,”Well, you should be nice and mow both lawns!” will immediately be unfriended, however. I’ve unfriended people for much less than that, and if you think I’m about to voluntarily mow extra space, I don’t think I trust you.

And for Lou, Round One was a big win!

“Lawn Chicken, Round One: A WIN! I was totally unprepared, actually. I was out doing some repairs on my son’s swing—See, I do some stuff around the house, and the neighbor pulled out his mower and started mowing. I thought I had a few weeks before I had to even think about mowing, actually, but a win’s a win.

A good start to the Lawn Chicken season! Can I hold this record? Tune in and see!”

Lou did not mention a prize, but I imagine something along the lines of a gold-plated lawn mower trophy would be in order. Hey Lou – what say you?